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women AHHHHH
Why is it hat you try to do every thing for them but they do not appreciate any of it and always expect more? I work 12 hours a day 6 days a week but she does not care. I am supposed to kiss her ass every minute of every day.
I am to the point where I am ready to tell here to take her stuff and get the hell out.
Am I the only one that is going through this? Any suggestions? I am loosing what is left of my mind.
PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!
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women AHHHHH
It has been two years. I know it has not been a long time to most but I am only 24. If it is like this now what will it be like in 5 or 10 years. I already take Valium to help control my outbursts. You see she has been spoiled by her parents her whole life. They paid all her bills ect. She is 25 years old I tell her it is time to get off her mothers tit and take responsibility for her self. I have been on my own since I was 15 years old. Pay my own bills and now hers. there seems to be no reasoning with her. I love her but I do not like her if that makes any sense? She does work but I do not know what she does with her money.She gives me about $200 a month the pay for $2500 a month in bills.
Do you think I stay with her for fear of being alone?
I have so many emotions running through my head and i can not concentrate on any of them.
As you all know I am an a$$ hole in here and in life. Maybe it is me. I am so confused my head is spinning.
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women AHHHHH
The funny thing is I have had the chance to have one on the side but I have the damn thing called a concisions. Came reel close but i almost vomited with guilt. And i never even kissed the girl it was just the thought of what might have happened.
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women AHHHHH
The doctor said at this point in time with stress at work and other factors in my life that that is the best med for me. I have tried Paxil, Effexor, Zoloft among other things this is the only thing that keeps my mood in check. I do not like it but if i do not take it bad things happen. I have only been on it for 2 weeks and the changes in my state of mind have been drastic. I an also limited to 1 month of use. So it has not been a habit.
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women AHHHHH
I have only been in one long term relationship before in which I produced my daughter(pic 8) that ended pretty bad. I am young and have no experience. It is sad to say but i learn from others mistakes. if it were up to me I would keep running into the same wall time after time until some one stopped me.
Any way thanks for listening and responding Because i am an a$$ hole I do not have many Friends you guys are about the ones I can count on for the truth no matter how bad it is. Again thanks.
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women AHHHHH
Thank you all for your comments. It has helped me open my eyes a little wider. Still confused but as they say Rome was not built in a day. I am sure in time what is meant to be will be.
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women AHHHHH
I have a split personality. I was not able to control which one was doing the talking and the actions. The first and the normal is the nice easy going guy that most people like and trust.
The second that I do not even know when it is there until it is too late is very verbally abusive, and some times physically. I have not ever laid a finger in her and hope that I never do. Inanimate objects (wall doors or what ever is in my hand at the time) get the brunt of my second side.
Yes I know that Valium is very addictive and possibly dangerous. But I am will to take that risk to keep my first personality at all times. I have been to all the phycs. ect. with no help.
When my second personality come out it is like I am looking in a mirror at myself but can not stop my reactions. I do not want to hurt anyone mentally or physically.
For me meds seem the only solution, I do not like it but I have to deal with it to keep my splits in check.
P.S. I have only been taking Valium for 2 weeks. I personally am very happy with the results. I have been once again become nice easy going guy that I once used to be all the time.
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women AHHHHH
Thanks for all your works of advice broken. Believe me they have seen my outbursts at work. None directed toward costumers but rather my management and parts dept. Evey one in there know to just leave me alone and all is good. I am trying to get out of the stress of twisting wrenches and get into the sales area which will be a whole lot less stress.(not to mention $$$)
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women AHHHHH
Archdean:
I would not say that I am whining but maybe venting.
Here is some more "venting" I would like to take your face and shove it through a concrete wall. Hell you must be god damn perfect. I am soo sorry for taking up your valuable time. Send me a fu--ing bill you piece of $hi+.
Yeah I know those comments were not necessary and very belligerent, but it is just the "whiner" in me.
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women AHHHHH
Dude like I said before I have been taking care of my self since I was 15. You need you realize what is whining and what is venting.
This whole thread started as a way to seek advice about women. That area I am not too well knowledgeable on.
Now at 24 I make in excess of $45 thousand a year with nothing but a H.S. diploma. I must be doing some thing right in the life area.
I am independent and do not know how to compromise on letting some one else in to share in my life. That was the what I was trying to get out of this thread.
The thing with the meds is irrelevant at this point. I can take care of my self and have learned how to take care of my child, but with out a woman there to work around. That is my problem that is what I was seeking advice on.
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women AHHHHH
Well at least you all had fathers to give you guidance.
As for the statement that I can take care of my self means in the life making decisions. Not romance/ relationship status. As i am used to fending only for 2 I now have 3.
My statement about the money I make was to state that I am capable of success. I Know quite a few collage grads that do not have such good luck.
I know I have problems. And I DO NOT try to make excuses for them, I am stating the cause of them.
Every body know your up bringing has a lot to do with the way you turn out as an adult. My father was an you know what (left when I was 9) I tried to do the best I could but I Guess it was not good enough.
Archdean the attitude you have I would not be surprised if your kids hate you too.
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women AHHHHH
My memory must be going too. I did not realize I was blaming you?
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women AHHHHH
What scares me the most out of any thing in this world is me turning in to my father. I can see more of him in me every day and i get worried, What is my daughter going to think of me in 10 or 20 years. But believe me I try my damnedest to be the best father in the world in fact she is my world. What really gets me is when she is around when me and her step mother get into it. I remember what it was like for me and it is no place for a child to be.
To finally try to end this thread I really care less about my happiness. All I want is for my child to be loved and know that she is loved. TO HELL with women!! All they do is make life difficult. I will just smile and nod from now on.
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women AHHHHH
O.K. so I am back again.
Nature vs. Nurture? What are your feelings on that?
I have not been around my father a very often. Even when my parents were married he alienated me (among other things), but I saw how he treated my mother(like garbage).
So is my behavior learned, or inherited genetically?
You see I was around him just enough that it could go either way. Right or wrong?
If it is learned then maybe I can unlearn it.
But what if it is genetic? Am I screwed for the rest of my life to be a jerk that nobody likes.
Archdean
You seem to be pretty level headed at what is your perspective of this.
I am not trying to whine or complain I just do not have time $$ for a shrink.
I am trying to be open to any suggestions that may be out there.
Like I said some times i am a nice guy other times i am not and I want to be the nice guy all the time with out MEDS.!!!
I know i come across hash I am not good at taking criticism, and I speak before I think.
Dean, I am sure you are a wonderful father and I apologize for my previous comments. And as I also said before I really do not care if I am rotting in a corner some where as long as my daughter is happy. I do not want her to do through what I am going through now.(yeah yeah whine whine) I just want what is best for her as all fathers do(well almost all).
My thoughts are just twisted in knots and I can't seem to find the right solution. I also know that my skull is about 10" thick so it takes allot of pounding for me to finally grasp what I am being told.
As a final note I do respect ALL and I do mean ALL of you hear. I never mean to hurt any ones feelings or make them fell stupid or inferior.
What I want is to help people with the tractor problems and concerns. Yeah I'm 24 but I have been holding a screw driver and a wrench since I could crawl.
I just want to get my head strait so I can help here and else where more.
You guys are all great
Thank you from all I've got,
Tony
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women AHHHHH
It is not that I can not afford therapy, it is that right now work is demanding many long hours and I do not have the time at this point. I am currently looking for a phyc. that will suit my needs. Like every thing else I like to shop around and get local referrals. For me church is not really an option I lost my faith a few years ago seeing too many good people hurt or killed for no apparent reason. I do believe in a higher power though at this point i do not know what that higher power may be. There are thousands of religions out there and the basis of them all is a higher power which ever it may be so maybe I am safe in my belief maybe I will burn but who is to say.
Anyway thank you all for your comments and advice I know I will make it through this time in life just as i have in the past. Some times the stress just gets too high and I do not know where to turn.
It is easier to talk to you guys probably because you are all faceless nameless strangers in the most part.
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Gas Generator Weather Protecti
08-31-2004, 19:43 
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